Last Friday, I received the kind of news that stops time. My dear mentor, colleague, and friend, Professor Malcolm, passed away.
I knew he had been in palliative care; he had faced his health challenges for a few years now and, in true Malcolm fashion, had always been incredibly open about them. Yet, even when you think you are prepared for the inevitable, the finality of the news hits you like a brick wall. Today, there is a massive, irreplaceable hole in the hearts of every single person who had the privilege of engaging with him.
My journey with Malcolm began in 2017 when he interviewed me for a Research Assistant role at Oxford. By March 2018, I officially joined his team. Little did I know then how much that single career move would fundamentally reshape who I am—not just as an academic, but as a human being.
Dismantling Hierarchies and Choosing Abundance
I recently read a book that touched upon the courage to be discouraged, and it made me think deeply about Malcolm. He is the only person I have ever met who truly, effortlessly walked the path he preached.
Coming from India, where the senior-junior hierarchy is deeply ingrained in us from childhood, working with Malcolm was a profound culture shock. He completely rejected hierarchy. He treated every single person he met as an absolute equal. To him, everyone was inherently good, and collaboration wasn’t just a buzzword—it was his entire motto.
In the often cutthroat world of academia, where gatekeeping and territorialism can run rampant, Malcolm showed me through his everyday actions that the pie is always big enough for everyone. He gave me the radical freedom to make mistakes, to stumble, and to learn from them without fear.
He didn’t just mould my career; he shaped my character. He was the one who gently encouraged me to try life coaching. During that time, he asked me a question that stopped me in my tracks: “Priya, what do you want people to say about you when you die?”
I wasn’t prepared for that question then. Truthfully, I’m still not prepared for it now. But Malcolm lived his life with the answer to that question completely figured out.
Lessons from a Master Mentor
Malcolm gave so much of his wisdom to the world. To remind myself of his philosophy, and to share a piece of his brilliance with those who never had the honour of meeting him, I want to list some of his most impactful recommendations here. He may have gathered these from different corners of his life, but to me, they will always belong to him:
- The Rule of 3: Plan your week around just three key highlights you want to achieve by Friday. Protect your focus.
- The Curiosity Starter: Start conversations by asking, “What is an interesting insight you recently gathered?”
- Problem-First Thinking: Think big. Focus entirely on the problem you are trying to solve, not just the skills you currently have. You can always learn or bring in the skills needed to solve a worthy problem.
- Calculated Clarity: Use a weighted pros-and-cons table for complex decision-making.
- Accountable Independence: Give your team members the absolute freedom to lead, while still standing firmly accountable for them.
- Wing-Giver Leadership: Help your colleagues grow both in their careers and in their personal lives. Give them the wings to fly. When you do, they don’t just stay colleagues—they become your wider circle of lifelong friends across the world.
- The Craft of Academia: He mastered—and taught—even the smallest nuances, from how to critically read a journal paper to how to write prose that genuinely captures the reader’s heart and mind.
- The “3 S” Framework: Synergy, Serendipity, and Serenity. Spend your intentional time building connections (Synergy), because the world becomes a far better place to live in when we invite unexpected joy (Serendipity) and peace (Serenity) into our days.
Looking to the Future: What Truly Matters
Losing Malcolm has forced a deep wave of reflection over me. Having also recently experienced a terrifying, near-miss health scare with my daughter, I am being grounded by a stark, undeniable reminder: Life is simply too short to waste on the trivial things.
We lose ourselves so easily in the hustle, the stress, and the minor anxieties of daily life. But the reality is that tomorrow is never promised.
If there is one way we can carry Malcolm’s incredible legacy forward into the future, it is to live more intentionally. Take the time today to send a note to someone you love. Dedicate unconditional time to your family and friends. When the noise of our careers fades away, these are the people who will be there for you—and the ones who will stand by your family when you are no longer here.
Thank you for everything, Malcolm. You taught us how to fly, and we will keep flying, carrying your serenity and synergy with us.
Rest in peace.
